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Many of us have felt it: There's someone on our minds, and even though they don't feel the same way, we still feel the desire to build a relationship. Loving someone you can't have can take a toll on your mental health, and longing to be with them can be heart-wrenching. This type of emotional turmoil can feel unrelenting at times. But while you may feel like all hope is lost, it's important to remember that this person, ultimately, only plays a small role in the timeline of your life.
Even if you're in love with someone you can't have, there are plenty of ways to work with your brain—not against it—to stop loving them. Below, read on to learn five ways to get past unrequited love and how to move on the right way from experts Jeremy Nicholson and Chloe Carmichael. Meet the Expert. When you love someone you can't have, it's common to bury your feelings in an effort to avoid the painful realities of your situation.
It may seem easier to push these feelings of grief away, but working through loss is an important step to get past the longing. This can happen when there is a friendship with mixed als—or we misconstrue the interest of someone else. Whether you're still in love with your ex, crushing on someone who's unavailableor feeling rejected, taking the time you need to acknowledge your feelings and feel your emotions is crucial to the process of moving on.
Sometimes, you might even find that the attraction isn't based on the individual, but the actual desire to be in a relationship. When was the last time you did something nice for yourself? Rather than devoting your emotional energy to thinking of someone else, try to focus on the first person who deserves your love—you. One way to change this is to deliberately create new experiences to help the old memories start to recede.
New experiences can also subtly reassure us that there are other possibilities in life.
This isn't a time for getting lost in the memories: It's a time for making new ones. Concentrate on your personal happiness, mental health, and physical well-being. By pampering yourself and practicing acts of self-love and care, you can put your focus to better use by improving your own life. Don't be afraid to try something new, like traveling, ing up for a new fitness class, or learning a skill or hobby you've always been interested in.
What's important is the choice to make a healthy use of your time, and allowing yourself to let go of hurtful memories. When you're going through difficult times in life—whether in love or not—your support system can make it easier. Instead of spending time alone and shutting the world out, now is a good time to reach out to other people you care about.
Your friends and family can offer great support, guidance, and love. By being around people with positive energy who have your best interest, you can reshape your mindset and embrace their optimistic outlooks. Their experiences can also help you put your current situation in perspective, as they've likely been there before as well. Close relationships can be a great emotional resource, and they'll provide you with insight and direction when it comes to moving on.
But remember that the process of healing takes time—and rather than setting high expectations for yourself, it's okay to be proud that you were open to love in the first place. Whether you were in a committed relationship or not, it's helpful to remember that the person you love is an individual. They may not be interested in a relationship with you, or they may simply not be in the right mindset for romance to begin with. Ultimately, it's best to use these feelings as a way to move on. While it's okay to still have feelings for this person, you have to make your peace with the situation.
Accept the reality, but remember that it can take time. Don't be hard on yourself if you're not entirely over them—these transitions don't happen overnight. One of the most important takeaways from dealing with unrequited love is the understanding that you will find love again.
While it may feel like a happy relationship just isn't in the cards for you, this simply isn't the case. Self-care and building stronger relationships with friends and family can speed up the process. Once you're confident in your daily life again, it won't feel so difficult to open up to new people. Take a moment to think about it: If you can feel this much love for someone you're not with, the amount of love you'll find in the right relationship will exceed these feelings in the best way. Rather than giving up on love, look forward. It's okay to let this person go in favor of excitement for meeting the next person.
While it wasn't meant to be this time, it's only a step in the process of finding what's best—and it'll be even better after looking back on this experience. Your Privacy Rights. To change or withdraw your consent choices for Brides. At any time, you can update your settings through the "EU Privacy" link at the bottom of any.
These choices will be aled globally to our partners and will not affect browsing data. We and our partners process data to: Actively scan device characteristics for identification. I Accept Show Purposes. Stacey Laura Lloyd is an author with a passion for helping others find happiness and success in their dating lives as well as in their relationships. Brides's Editorial Guidelines. Meet the Expert Jeremy Nicholson M. Chloe Carmichael, Ph. What Is Gaslighting in a Relationship? An Expert Explains.
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